If I’m honest I don’t know God loves me.
Maybe I should clarify: I know God loves me, but I don’t KNOW God loves me.
Clear as mud, right?
Here’s the thing, my head knows God loves me. I’ve been told how much ever since I first asked Him to come into my messed up life nearly twenty five years ago and I read the words in the pages of my Bible, listen to it in catchy worship songs, and hear it every Sunday in church.
I get it; He loves me. That’s not the problem.
The problem is it’s not enough. I want more.
I don’t want to just know it in my head; I want to feel it in my toes, in the warm fuzziness of my aching heart and the raw, empty, hidden places in my soul.
I want to know it where it can change me. Where it will help me stop beating myself up and believing I’m not enough, and where it can heal the anger and resentment that rises up when I think of the death of my mum and sister from cancer way before their time and then my own diagnosis.
Maybe you understand. I wonder if intellectually you’ve got no problem with the fact God loves you unconditionally but it hasn’t made the hard twelve inch journey from your grey matter to your heart where it’s started to heal and sooth you.
Let me introduce this chap to you.
This is my Dad. We laugh, a lot!
I love him and I know he loves me. He’s not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, nor is his love for me perfect (sorry Dad) but then, who is perfect? Who can love me perfectly?
Oh yes, God is (I know, I’m a genius). He’s perfect and so is His love for all of us.
Like my Dad, God’s my Father too (albeit a heavenly one, without skin on, but possibly with a very similar beard), so why do I find it so hard to grasp His love for me when, unlike my Dad, He’s totally perfect and has never let me down (and never will).
I don’t want the knowledge of God’s love to stay stubbornly in my head and not find its way to my heart where I so desperately want to know it and feel it, and where it can start to heal and mend the broken painful parts of within me.I don’t want the knowledge of God’s love to stay stubbornly in my head and not find its way to my heart where I so desperately want to know it and feel it, and where it can start to heal and mend the broken painful parts of within me. Click To Tweet
My Dad’s love made the 12 inch journey and I want God’s love to as well.
Whether our fathers are the model of a prefect Dad, horribly abusive or totally absent, so many of us have hearts aching to know God’s love deeply—to know we are loved, accepted, chosen, wanted, adored, and cherished. We want that love to change us and heal us.
The good news is God can’t help but love you. It’s who He is; love itself. It’s got nothing to do with us and everything to do with Him.
The bad news is letting His love sink into and minister to the nooks and crannies of our souls isn’t easy.
But it’s not impossible. Just read these stories if you’re in any doubt.
If you know anything about me you know I love helping us grab the most out of life, no matter what gets thrown our way. But I know it can be tricky and take time and honesty.
If you’re like me (and suspect you are) you’ve not only struggled with God’s love but you’ve wrestled with questions like these,
- How can I trust God when I look around and my life’s a mess?
- How do I hear God’s voice when life’s so noisy and what does it sound like anyway?
- How do I fight the lies I believe and the self doubt and shame I struggle with when I feel powerless?
If these resonate with you and you want to answers and to know God’s love deep in your heart, come and join me for the first of a series of FREE THRIVE TRIBE LIVE WORKSHOPS where we’ll dive into these tough conundrums and you’ll leave with practical, life changing steps to grow in your faith.
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Parts of this piece first appeared on www.katiemreid,com