As New Year’s Eve approached and 2016 began to dwindle I meant to do so much; transfer dreams from my heart to tangible goals on paper, choose a “Word” for 2017, write more, post more, ask you dear friends what you’re going through and how I might help best. Add to that the mountain of family “stuff” I want/need to do, like spend time with my kids without saying “have you tidied your room?” and get my son’s 19th birthday present in the post before he turns 35.
But I’ve procrastinated, putting things off under the camouflage of “It’s the holidays, I’ll do it in the new year.” But the new year is here, the door has closed on 2016, and 2017 stands open and inviting, but still, like a bunny in headlights, I freeze.
Why? Because I’m afraid.
There I said it. I’m frightened.
Procrastination is the visible face of ours hidden fears. Procrastination is the visible face of ours hidden fears. Click To Tweet
I’m frightened of failing, looking stupid, what you’ll think, getting it wrong, what might happen, upsetting people, of failing (I’ know I said that, but that really scares me), and I hate the thought of letting everyone down.
As I sat at the kitchen table this morning pouring my heart out to God, He lead me to Joshua 1:9. The familiar verse reminds us (actually it commands us) to not be afraid because He’s with us. He nailed it – what’s the worst that could happen if He’s with me? Then He and gently reminded me that my sweet friend Kelly Balarie had sent me a guest post about Beating the Beast of Worry. So I’m sharing my fears with you, just as she shares hers with us all, to encourage us that God is with us, and we needn’t be afraid.
Kelly’s a gem and a cheerleader of everyone she meets. Let’s live 2017 fearless – Oh, I think I’ve found my word for 2017!! FEARLESS!!
I woke up in the middle of the night, my mind tossing and turning worse than my body had been ten minutes ago.
Everything hit me at once: I‘m not taking care of my family well enough. Good moms make their kids homemade meals, they don’t buy the boxed variety in the aisle’s of Trader Joe’s. They also don’t have picture ornaments hanging on their Christmas trees without the faces of their loved ones in them. Most of all they don’t forget birthday parties and gym day at school. Not only this, they don’t leave their houses complete wrecks; they tidy them. I’m the worst mom. I’ve got to do better. I can’t do better though, there is hardly any time for anything. My kids are bound to hate me one day.
Worry is like a spin cycle that never ends. It turns and turns and turns and turns until you are nauseous from its movement.
I should know; I sit in worry often. Do you?
The worst thing about worry is that all its circles get you nowhere. They clean nothing up, they spic and span no dish sitting in the sink and they fix no task before you.
So, why do I worry so much? You may be asking yourself the same question.
I’ve sat up countless nights circling this question. Kelly, why are you worrying? Why are you shredding a good night’s sleep with this stupid process? And, why can’t you stop thinking about what you are thinking about?
Nothing of value is every accomplished in one’s mind in the middle of the night. I’ve determined this.
So, what is a peace-hungry woman supposed to do?
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” Phil. 4:8
That’s what! Do you know how it looks for me in the middle of the night, when the sneaky enemy prowls around like a ravenous beast?
It looks like me saying the ABC’s of God’s goodness.
It goes like this:
A is for Always by my side, God will be.
B is for Before me, God goes.
C is for Carry me He will, when I am weak.
D is for Delight in him, he will give me the desires of my heart.
Can I tell you all something? I’ve never made it all the way through the alphabet. Never. Ever. Ever.
I’ve always fallen asleep – in peace.
When you focus on the goodness of God, you find the good thing you were always after. When you trust him and his ways, he leads you to the best way. When you stop worrying that you are worrying, you make space to start praising his name.When you focus on the goodness of God, you find the good thing you were always after.@kellybalarie Click To Tweet
It works. It works anywhere at any time in any place. Start singing. Start thanking. Start noticing creation as you drive on a traffic-filled street full of cars that will never let you arrive at your destination. Still, it works.
With this, tonight, rather than dozing off to the doozy that is my motherhood-style; I’ll doze off to the truth that God has good in store even in the center of all I cannot control.
Meet Kelly Balarie:
Kelly is both a Cheerleader of Faith and a Fighter of Fear. She leans on the power of God, rests on the shoulder of Christ, and discovers how to glow in the dark places of life. Get all Kelly’s blog posts by email or visit her on her blog, Purposeful Faith. You can also find a variety of resources for your fight against fear at http://www.fearfightingbook.com/.
And read her book, Fear Fighting, Awakening the Courage to Overcome Your Fears:
Author and Speaker, Kelly Balarie didn’t always fight fear – for a large part of her life, she was controlled by it. Yet, in her book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears, with God, Kelly charts a new course. Join Kelly, on the journey to go and grow with Christ’s bravery, the Spirit’s counsel and God’s unending love that squelches fear. This book reads like a love letter from God, while offering practical heart-calming prayers, anxiety-reducing tips, and courage-building decrees that will transform your day. www.fearfightingbook.com